Too good to be healthy Fish and Chips

Total Time: 1 hour, unless "you rack-a disciprine" - South Park.

Ingredients:

Fish:

• 1 kg fish (Descaled! Don't assume all fish is automatically descaled like I did >_< )
• 1 1/2 Cups Brown/Wholemeal/Wholewheat bread flour
• 1 egg
• 1/4 Cup Lemon Juice
• 2/3 Cup Water
• 1 tsp salt
• 1 tsp brown sugar
• 1 tsp baking powder

Chips:

• As many potatoes as you want. But make sure you have enough oven space. They come out best when spread out (chip structures no higher than 2 chip stories max). You can use sweet potatoes (yams) or normal, the sweet potatoes being the healthier option.
• Enough olive oil to lightly cover the chips.
• Salt and pepper to taste, or whatever other spices tickle your fancy.

Instructions:

Chips:

1. Preheat oven to 200C and set to bake.
2. Peel potatoes and chop into chips. I generally go for about 7mm chip width.
3. Lightly cover chips with olive oil, add salt an pepper and gently mix with your hands until each chip has been marinated in olive oil and your added spices.
4. Line a baking tray or casserole dish with tinfoil (makes it easier to clean after) and spread out the chips on top.
5. Then put them on the oven for 40 minutes, flipping them over at the 20 minute mark.

Fish:

1. In one bowl, mix the egg, lemon juice, water and 1/2 cup flour. This bowl will be referred to as Copernicus.
2. In another mix the remaining 1 cup floor, sugar, salt and baking powder. This one shall be called Bob. Remember these names well, we're going to need them later.
3. Get a pan to medium heat. Add enough oil to cover the base. The less oil you use, the healthier it will be. You can use no oil and use baking spray instead if you're a health nut but keep a close eye on the batter so it doesn't get burnt. I tend to use about 3mm of oil.
4. Now for the real work. Dip a piece of fish in Copernicus, make sure its covered in the gooey mixture. This is the glue that will keep the batter on the fish.
5. Then dip the Copernicus covered fish in Bob. Flip the fish over a few times and make sure it has a nice, thick layer of batter on so your fish no longer looks naked.
6. Finally into the frying pan and cover the pan with a lid, or if you don't have one use a baking tray like the frying pan lidless author of this recipe. Generally oil doesn't splatter with this dish but just incase. Also keeps the batter on the top nice and moist.
7. Now that you have one piece of fish in it's own little oil sauna, you can repeat the process on another piece of fish until the pan base is covered with fishy oily goodness.
8. The fish usually takes about 3 minutes to cook each side so flip it after 3 minutes and check it after 6.
9. CALM YOUR T*TS AND FLIP YOUR CHIPS! I know you're now a master fryer with fishy egg all over your hands and dealing with a menacing frying pan but don't forget about those delicious little guys in the oven. You're never too busy to flip chips. Remember to do it at the 20 minute mark.

Serving Suggestions:

• On a plate -_-

Salsa

Ingredients:

• 2 Medium onions.
• 2 tomatoes.
• 2 tsp Lemon Juice
• 1 TBSP chopped coriander.
• 2 hot chillies finely chopped AND/OR some hot-sauce (depending on how macho your tastebuds are feeling).
• 3 cloves garlic.

Instructions:

1. CHOP EVERYTHING!!! Except the garlic, mince that (or just chop really, really small).
2. MIX EVERYTHING!!!
3. Some people eat it like that, some fry it for a few minutes in just enough oil to cover the bottom of the pan (very little oil). For me it depends, on chips I like it fried, on pre-cooked food I like it raw, especially on oily or cheesy food. The salsa stands out more if it isn't fried.

Serving Suggestions:

• As a chip dip. 
• Works great in adding flavour to wraps.
• On almost any Mexican food.

GuacaNyomNyom

Ingredients:

• Half Red, Orange or Yellow Bell Pepper
• 1 Avo
• 1/2 TBSP Wholegrain mustard OR 1tsp Wasabi Paste (depending on how macho you're feeling)
• 1 TBSP Soy Sauce
• 2 tsp lemon juice.

Instructions:

1. Grate pepper, into smallest possible pieces. 
2. Combine all ingredients in a bowl and mush together with a fork until the avo is completely mushed.

Serving Suggestions:

• Tastes great plain. Makes for a quick and healthy snack.
• As a chip dip. 
• ON BACON!!!